Those who wander

The night mists had departed, and sunlight warmed the large wolf's back. Above him, golden aspen leaves stood out against a clear blue sky. Today, Ilya had decided, he would do some gardening.

He had already spent some time gathering dried out seed husks and old flowers; he kept them in his den, which was little more than a space beneath a cliff's overhang. It was enough room for him, though, and he was afraid to try and claim anything larger. His collection of plants was starting to take up too much space. And if he wanted a good early spring harvest, he had to start planting now.

The only trouble was that he wasn't sure where the pack kept their gardens. He could dig out his own, of course, but he wanted the herbs he planted to be easily found by any healers among the pack. They weren't just for him! So he sought out a relatively familiar face. Ilya didn't properly know his name, yet, but he had seen him walking about with herbs. Hopefully he would be able to point him in the right direction.

With his mouth full of dried-up poppies and the pods of a curious blue flower he'd learned was called camas, he trotted up to @Renn.

“Hello,” Ilya said with a friendly wave of his tail. “Do you know where the gardens are? I want to plant these.”

---

Maybe Renn first, and then @Clay ?

the staff team luvs u

Renn had his back turned when the male approached him. An assorted pile of herbs were at his feet and he continued to pluck more from the spine. Not too many though. They still had to grow back. He was meticulous with the grip of his teeth, careful not not to puncture the plant past its thin barrier.

Startled, he ripped the leaf from the plant, splitting the piece he wanted in half. His ears fell against his head, upset, but he still turned around. It was a tall male. His lashes bat against his cheeks, his brow. Renn gawked, openly. He looked like he was from the stars themselves with the dappled white specs along his neck, and his fur must be so, so soft...

'Oh!' Renn realized that he did in fact ask him something. The gardens? Renn thought that he was the only one that tended to them. Suddenly defensive over his precious goods, he'd wonder what the male carried in his mouth. Or better question, who was he? 'Uh...yeah. Sure. What's your name?'

Renn didn't make any more show to show him where the gardens were yet. @Clay laid somewhere close by. They haven't really separated these past few days.

'I'm Renn.'

---

herbalist

the staff team luvs u

His tail swished lightly with the currents of the breeze, brushing back and forth over the stone he lay upon. Through the cracks that angled between the stone floor, small locks of greenery stretched upwards in their feeble attempts to reach the sky. When Clay grew tired of lingering within the shadows where he'd designated himself to avoid the boring herb picking, he pushed himself to his paws and began the slow trek through the brush, his lean figure sliding quietly through.

“Hey, I-” Clay hadn't noticed the figure before it was too late and his eyelids peeled open in surprise, sliding from the stricken Renn to the stranger wolf. Clay's mouth immediately dried whenever his eyes fell onto the tall man, sliding from his thick paws up to his eyes of warm gold, where an annoying blush came pooling into his cheeks. Clay's only solace was knowing the big wolf couldn't see past his fur. Thick lashes that bordered his green eyes beat together over several awe stricken pauses until Clay cleared his throat, slowly approaching and positioning himself at Renn's side.

“Erm...” Clay trailed off, simply at a loss for words and he cut his eyes towards Renn, hoping his friend would explain for him -- that was if the stranger realized Clay wasn't of Vanderfell and went to asking questions.

the staff team luvs u

The young wolf just stared at him. Ilya supposed he had startled him a little bit; he should have called out a greeting sooner.

…And then another wolf appeared, slightly older than the other. They were both looking at him now. Was there something stuck to his fur…? Feeling vaguely uncertain, Ilya didn’t notice that the newcomer smelled different. He greeted them both in what he hoped was the correct Vanderfell style, with a respectful dip of his head.

“I’m Ilya,” he said, his ears drooping. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you and your friend. Are you healers?”

Perhaps he was overstepping by trying to help? Ah…that was probably it. He set the bundle of herbs down at his feet and nudged it towards Renn and the other wolf. “I found some poppy and camas seed pods, and I thought they might be useful.”

the staff team luvs u

Renn heard Clay emerge from the darkness of the forest, the leaves and twigs crunching beneath his feet. He had grown...comfortable with his presence. It was a weird feeling. He still felt like he had been doing something wrong, but it felt so right to help him.

So then why did he feel so guilty?

But Renn didn't even look over his shoulder to Clay. His attention had been so profusely occupied by the man before him. A staunch, grizzly figure. A chill rippled up his spine and Renn had to force a swallow down his dry throat. Ilya was his name. It had a dash of femininity, but it felt strong. He looked strong, too.

'No!' Renn answered a bit too quickly. Oops. 'No, you didn't.' He would be quick to reaffirm, finally letting his gaze roll over towards Clay, then back to Ilya where it rightfully belonged. 'I tend to the garden, mainly.'

His attention was caught on the bundle of herbs swaddled together. Renn looked back towards Ilya as he offered his prize. 'Yeah, actually...' impressed, Renn would nudge the herbs between his feet onto his own pile. 'This is great, thank you.'

Renn didn't leave much room in the discussion. 'I can show you the way?' Renn would ask him, his tail lightly nudging Clay's hip in a playful manner. Exciting, isn't it? He wished to whisper it to Clay, but he didn't, only hoping that the anticipated action of his tail would tell him all he needed.

---

herbalist

the staff team luvs u

Relief washed over the wolf the moment the stranger made no fuss over Clay's presence. Perhaps Renn's own scent had begun to mask Clay's own, or maybe this stranger was just as much new as Clay was. Either were possible, and it didn't matter which one it was. He felt his eyes cutting towards Renn as the wolf introduced himself as Ilya... a pretty name, fitting for such a charming wolf, Clay thought. His eyes dropped to his paws that shuffled anxiously beneath him, watching the earth rend beneath his weight as the two got on and spoke about their herbs. Then, he felt bashful -- he hadn't even offered his name. 

The nudge of Renn's tail brought a small smile to Clay's face, one he tried to hide by lowering his face. When Renn moved, Clay moved, shadowing his friend. He took up the back, trailing calmly behind the forms of the two healers as Renn led them towards the gardens; Clay had been once or twice with Renn over the small handful of days he'd been staying with him. He tried, he really did try to dabble in all this... flower picking and stuff, but he just couldn't. Little interested Clay these days, little aside from the burning hot, scalding penchant for revenge that drowned him. 

Clay eventually spoke, eyeballing Ilya. 

“My name is Clay... if you were wondering.”

the staff team luvs u

They were still looking at him oddly, but the demeanour of both wolves seemed to shift. Ilya’s ears perked up, a bit relieved. He was glad, at least, to learn that he had brought something of use to the pack. …Well, he’d already known it was useful, but he’d doubted himself for a minute there.

He nodded with a small smile.

“Thank you,” he said gently, and followed a few paces behind the other two wolves. They were evidently good friends, walking in step. They might even be brothers; their gray pelts were similar. Somehow, he hadn’t seen the darker of the pair before. Perhaps he was shy? Ilya was still fairly new; it wouldn’t surprise him if he hadn’t seen all of the wolves here yet.

He was surprised when the darker wolf spoke up, and smiled back encouragingly.

“It’s good to meet you, Clay,” Ilya said. It was an unusual name among the Vanderfell wolves; he probably wasn’t one of the children, then. Some other relative? He thought vaguely of Greyback.

“Are you fond of gardening as well?” he asked.

the staff team luvs u

This new face in Vanderfell would do Renn some good. He began to go stir crazy with all this family around him. Maybe that's why he decided to take Clay in under his own shadowed wing. Because he was lonely. He only thought of how he would be reprimanded for such a thing. He swallowed at the idea of losing his tail.

Renn continued towards the gardens. His ear twitched when he heard Clay introduce himself and he almost threatened a small laugh. But he held his tongue once they made the final corner. Beneath a veil of hanging lavender and other herbs, Renn lifted it with his head.

'Just through here.' He'd say with his mouth full of herbs.

He let the pair of them go first before he sealed the imaginable vault of the garden. With quick steps, Renn went to work, letting the herbs drop from his mouth onto the ground before him. He'd mirror the scents of the growing sprouts and the herbs that lay there, matching them to their particular spot.

Hmm, he could definitely use help.

'One of you digs?' He'd ask kindly, hoping not to interrupt their own conversation.

---

herbalist

the staff team luvs u

Are you fond of gardening as well? He couldn't help the cheesy smile that broke out across his maw, infectious and curling as it came, easily reaching his eyes that glittered softly. Clay tossed a knowing glance towards Renn at his side, before a soft snicker left him. At least he felt at ease, like he could laugh and breathe. Ilya was soft, like a breath of fresh air. He didn't expect anything of them. 

“N-no.” Clay wanted to bite the inside of his cheek at the way he stuttered over the simplest of words, a curse he'd been suddenly afflicted with since his arrival on this plane. Clay looked back at Ilya just before their venture came to a short close, moving to surpass Renn as he unveiled the growth that enclosed the gardens. “I just watch.”

He skirted the edges of the sprawling gardens, his eyes briefly hopping from plant to plant before he settled onto his haunches. He slowly began to lower his body to the ground just before Renn asked for help, bringing Clay to shift his eyes to Ilya and his own bundle of herbs. He didn't hide his grumble as he winced and brought himself back to his paws, ignoring the stiffness in the skin around his scabbed wounds. “I-I will.” He huffed, sniffing out the spots Renn wanted dug out. 

Paws went to work clawing away the top soil, uncovering spots for the two to plant their bounties. 

the staff team luvs u

“You should give it a try,” Ilya said with a smile. “I find gardening helps put my mind at ease. Especially weeding. It's satisfying.” Ripping out weeds was probably the most aggressive thing he had done in his life, and he intended to keep it that way. There was hunting, but hunting was about precision and skill. Aggression only made a mess.

At Renn's request, Ilya was about to offer when Clay beat him to it. But as he watched the other wolf, his brow furrowed with concern. He was injured, Ilya realized, and still healing. He stepped forward.

“Take it easy there. You don't want to rip those open,” Ilya said gently. Or get dirt in the wounds, which could lead to infection. He paused, thinking.

“Here, I have an idea,” he continued. “I'll dig, and Renn can show you how to plant the seeds. What do you think?”

He looked between Renn and Clay hopefully. How Clay had been so severely injured was a mystery to him. Had there been intruders on packlands lately? He hadn't noticed any unusual scents, nor had he heard of any brewing tensions. A hunting accident, maybe? He pondered as he set to digging, careful but confident with his paws.

the staff team luvs u

Renn hoped Ilya would volunteer for the honors to dig, but Clay beat him to it. He was slowly starting to understand the facets of who Clay was— a helping hand that wished to prove himself. Just like Renn. In many ways they were one in the same and he found solace in his presence. Many of their days spent together now were spent in comfortable silence. He had always wanted to ask about his injuries, but he thought he would tell him on his own time.

Renn would watch as Clay began to dig, taking careful note of the healing wounds around his body. The slashes were still fresh and needed stillness to heal, not action. Ilya verbalized that for him, though, and gently moved Clay to the side. Renn nodded with agreement.

He shifted to the side, nudging Clay's shoulder again with a small grin as he gawked at Ilya's shifting frame as he dug. Muscles that were once hidden flexed as his shoulders moved.

'Like this,' he breathed, looking down at the pile of herbs that needed to be planted. 'Some have seed pockets like this one,' he nudged over a small stem that had little seeds around it. 'Some we just bury the stems.'

Renn nudged over the remaining ones that he had sorted. 'Then place them in the middle there,' his eyes glanced to Ilya, 'And he'll cover them up. Easy enough, right?'

---

herbalist

the staff team luvs u

He'd felt the stares of the two digging into his pelt, burrowing deeper into the healing wounds that sliced through him. He hoped maybe they would ignore them, that they wouldn't open their mouths. But he'd been wrong, and he'd done his best to ignore the amounting pressure that bubbled into his throat whenever he felt Ilya come closer, whenever he'd heard him speak. The fur at the nape of his neck bristled.

“I- I-” Flustered, irritated, the wolf whirled around to snap an icy glare towards Ilya. He nearly snarled, but bit back the instinct, swallowing it as if it were one of Renn's bitter, disgusting poultices. I don't need your fucking sympathy. He wanted to growl. He didn't need to be coddled. But Clay didn't say it, instead pulling his harsh eyes towards Renn, who seemed to look right through him. Renn's nod was the nail in the coffin. “Fine.” The word was bitter upon his tongue. 

Reluctantly, Clay moved out of the way of Ilya so that he could continue what Clay had started. His ears flattened against his head as he approached his friend's side, and he did his best to listen to what he said, what he explained. Yet, he heard nothing above the rush of adrenaline through his ears. Renn had begun to go about his planting and Clay simply stood there, staring at the seeds and stems that rested between his two paws.

He couldn't do this. So he didn't, angrily scraping a mound of dirt over what Renn had allotted him and off he went, storming out of the gardens, his hackles bristling with agitation.

im dead -- exit clay

---

the staff team luvs u

It seemed his attempts to help had backfired dramatically.

Clay didn’t say anything, but Ilya could see anger steaming under the surface. Too startled to say anything, he just waited for the outburst. But it didn’t come. The other wolf just stormed off, and that almost felt worse.

He stared down at his paws, afraid to meet Renn’s gaze. Afraid to say anything else. All he knew to do was to keep working, and so he did. He didn’t say a word as he dug out the rest of the holes.

He wondered how he could have been so stupid. Ilya had never been wanted or needed, and for very good reason.

the staff team luvs u

'Clay!' Renn would shout, hoping to reach his ears after his apparent stomping of the mounds of dirt. But Clay didn't turn when Renn called out to him, causing for the boy's onyx tipped ears to cinch against his head. Was it his fault? It wasn't apparent if it was. Renn knew not to ask about Clay's scars. He would opt for silence, taking him as the man, friend, he was.

He felt a sudden irritation as he looked towards Ilya, who seemed to be drowning himself in work. The holes would continue be dug in silence and Renn was grateful for that.

Renn would fill the holes with the seeds, pieces of branches, and would cover them up. Easy enough. By the time they were done, Renn's irritation at Ilya's question had simmered. He was only curious— and it's not like Clay's scars are easily avoided to the eye. He was a walking, tattered, piece of prey in many eyes. But not Renn's.

'It's not your fault.' Ilya may not know what he spoke of after how long it's been since either one of them had spoke. 'Clay, I mean. He's deeply traumatized, at least I think so. He doesn't really talk to me about it. But I don't ask, either.'

It was the most Renn had ever said aloud about Clay. To verbalize what he truly thought of the stone-tinted man. His friend. 'Thanks for helping me. You should come by more often—' had that been an invitation? Was Renn inviting Ilya to spend more time with him? 'The gardens always need work.'

Hopefully that would mask the impulse that he had to want to spend time with him.

---

herbalist

the staff team luvs u

When the silence was abruptly breached, Ilya’s ear twitched. He still didn’t meet Renn’s gaze, only nodding quietly in acknowledgement. It was kind of him to try and reassure him, but Ilya knew full well that it was hollow. It was his fault, plain and simple. He had only been trying to be kind, but the road to Hell was paved with good intentions.

After all, his own father had believed what he did would make Ilya strong. Maybe it would’ve worked, even, if he’d been a different person. But Ilya was Ilya, and so it hadn’t.

At Renn’s offer, however, he did turn his head to look at the other wolf. He managed a small but genuine smile.

“Thank you, Renn,” he said quietly. “I would like that.”

With that, he turned and left, head and tail held low.

---

Ilya out!

the staff team luvs u