If I ever were to lose you, I'd surely lose myself.

In the days since the meeting with Ira and @Reiko, Quicksilver allowed himself some time to let his emotions temper. He felt that they could all benefit from the quiet, to turn focus toward healing rather than fighting another round.

He was a man of many regrets, and he had come to see so many of those more clearly. Quicksilver knew he'd allowed himself to grow comfortable with the way things were, blind to the struggles of his beloved, and had been a fool to think they could simply resume their relationship where they'd left off. It was never going to be that simple. Love was as much about giving as it was about taking, and it seemed Reiko and Quicksilver both had a lot of learning to do.

He hoped they could do so together.

The medic went to her gently after sunset, seeking her among the mazes of Skelmir's Pass where he observed she'd recently gone to regroup her wolves. Quicksilver knew Reiko well enough to know she likely felt herself imposing, eager to seek a space of her own to self-sustain. He almost lost himself along the trails in search of any sign of her, but when at last he noticed the pale-furred Empress he paused for a moment to drink deep the sight of her.

His own anger had subsided, but had hers? Had he given her enough time to yearn for him as she once did, or had she perhaps realised he wasn't worthy of her heart?

With a pain in his heart he realised she had spoken no words of affection to him since they'd reunited. Her concerns had been with the way she looked after the battle for the Everfrost, and all interaction with her following had felt like business arrangements. Where his love continued to pulse strong within him, he feared hers might've dissipated.

Quicksilver inhaled deep, and strode forward to join her.

“Reiko,” he mustered softly, giving no time for her to turn her tail on him again, “are you... can we talk?”


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The clouds had faded tonight making it easier to watch the celestial bodies as they glimmered above. Though in Vanderfell's claim with mountain peaks higher than those of Tsukiishi, it didn't feel like they were much closer to the stars shining in the night sky. As though no matter how high up they would climb the stars would forever remain at a steady distance away. In moments like these where she could breathe and observe, a single notion invaded her thoughts.

She couldn't remember the ones from back home.

How strange that now these stars were becoming more familiar to her than the ones she had been born under. Would most of her memories fade as well, leaving her with nothing than what was brought in this new life of theirs?

Before she could ponder on such questions further, Quicksilver's voice called out and her immediate reaction was to falter. For ears to flatten against her skull and shrink. Though his voice was gentle, the memories it brought cut through her.

“Yes.” If they were going to fix anything she had to keep communication open with the druid despite how negatively it had gone this far. Even as she questions their ability to live happily as husband and wife soon, it was not time yet to stop trying.

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She withered at the sight of him, and the druid did not move in as near to her as he desired. Quicksilver didn't really understand her reaction - he had not struck her and never would. His words had been cutting, but her own tongue had lashed him with cruel reminder of the past. His powder blue gaze lingered on Reiko's face as she turned to look upon his and found only hollowness in the cerulean of her eyes.

He exhaled through his nostrils. He'd prepared himself for this encounter, yet in that moment everything he wanted to say had fled from his thoughts.

“I think,” he started softly, a discomfort to him as he lowered his eyes and shifted, “that... that you and I have been through too much together to give up.”

He paused, uncertain if the feeling was mutualand afraid of the possibility that the snowflower would reject him again. Quicksilver swallowed, and carried on: “nothing has the luxury of staying the same. All we can do is make good changes to what we can control, and-” emotion caught up with him, and he took a few seconds to steady himself, “and let go of what we can't.”

He blinked up toward her features again, lovely as ever despite recent wounds that were sure to scar. “I am sorry.”


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In the pale moonlight her frail undersized figure shimmered. Was she a shell of the woman when once was, or a fragile chrysalis incubating for a powerful monarch to erupt? Only time would tell as a tempest raged on testing their durability further - was this the eye of the storm or the end of it all and the birds would soon sing with the clearing of skies?

He spoke gently, with words that weren't cutting or accusatory. Cerulean irises raised to meet his without the rigidity they held before, but with a melting softness instead. The jagged edges were smoothed by warmth.

Gingerly she stepped forward with his apology, a welcoming sign as opposed to the closed-off walls she had put up moments ago. “I am too...” The words slipped slowly from her maw.

“I am not perfect... I have made mistakes.” Though she stood by them as the right decision at the moment, given the lack of support and time she had to discuss any other options. They were mistakes that hurt others, even if they were meant to help in dire situations. “I will never be perfect, but I can be better.”

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Reiko swept forward, closer, and the scent of her that he so adored flooded his senses. The druid watched the way she slackened, softened, offered a sliver of the she-wolf he'd fallen in love with and some small hope that things might just be alright.

He managed a smile, one that quivered with the weight of his heart.

“Nobody is perfect,” the medic crooned in attempt to reassure - because he'd never expected her to be anyone other than herself. “And we don't have to be, we just...” Reiko had already said it herself. They could only try to be better: for their packs, for each other.

For their future.

The silverwhite flicked his tongue nervously over a canine, and he shifted to suggest a walk - lingering just long enough for the dove to saunter alongside him. It'd always been easier to direct his energy toward moving while he considered his words. “I was afraid to ask you to marry me, honestly. Afraid of... of failing you. Of not meeting your expectations,” he sighed. Her initial proposal of sending their firstborn off to Ira for was a wound that still smarted - he wasn't prepared to discuss it again, now that It'd been buried. “Because in this world where you are an ocean,” vast, shimmering, full of life, “I am just a stone.”

Small.

Insignificant.

Sinking...


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It seemed she had inadvertently finished his thought. All the while the druid spoke, the empress kept on stepping forward a little more. Wanting to bridge that gap that had grown between them carefully, cautiously and would wait should he show signs of discomfort at her approach. He was right, they had gone through so much and rushing a healing wound would only leave deep scars that may never mend.

Without any signs for her to stop, she stood next to him. Shoulder and hip touching him in a light reminder she was here. She'd walk with him, rubbing her muzzle against his shoulder as he explained his fears, his concerns and how he was so small and insignificant compared to her - in his eyes at least.

She didn't agree with his views, but wouldn't fight it. They had fought too often as-is. “If that is the case —” Strong if. “Then remember an ocean polishes its stones, and you are one in a million. You shine brightest and bring beauty to my waves.”

He wasn't insignificant. Especially not to her.

For a moment she may have questioned their ability to move past and grow after the recent turmoils, those worries were quickly forgotten in this moment.

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He swayed toward the snowflower as she brushed against him, lovingly mingling the wispy silver furs of his hip with the Winterwhite of hers. His bump against her was affectionate, almost daring to be playful, though he did not press for more. They had much to discuss of a more serious nature, though he was infinitely grateful to feel some return of warmth in the spaces he'd watched grow between them in recent days.

Her words sounded like music, and he was lured in by siren song. Quicksilver swept his tail gently at his hocks and turned his head to glance Reiko's way as she carried on with his little metaphor in an effort to set a foundation for the lack of confidence in himself. His heart soared; Reiko was sure to build him up where he'd previously crumbled.

She would nurture him, as he would nurture her.

“The ocean is everything this pebble wants to be,” Quicksilver answered, “I hope to someday learn her secrets.”


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The shared bump of their slim frames didn't go unnoticed - though she too didn't feel it was appropriate to play right now. There were wounds that needed treating, the type that traditional medicine could not reach. It had been a long year, and it would take a while for things to ever feel normal again between them but as Quicksilver had stated... they have been through too much together to give up.

“I do not think our scars will ever fade.” She'd speak while trying to keep up with his graceful gait. Letting metaphors speak for themselves through the intentions being shared. “But... I believe this can make us stronger too. Wounds can be ugly, and painful... but the skin grows back stronger than before. I believe we can too.”

They just needed time to rest. For the world to stop battering at their doors and force action when they weren't ready to do so. “We will teach each other... and the lessons will never end. If you will grow with me Quicksilver, I will with you, too.”

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I do not think our scars will ever fade.

Quicksilver tilted his sterling ears backward; had she somehow read his mind? Though his heart longed to reconnect with that of his snowflower, some small part of him remained guarded. The druid, despite wanting to let go of what he couldn't control, wasn't quite ready to forgive Reiko for the initial offering she'd made to Ira in exchange for Vanderfell's aid.

But he was willing to try.

The silverwhite was quiet for a time, mulling it over, and reminded himself to be content with the compromise - that there would be no expectation of his offspring. He would carry that responsibility so they did not have to.

“I will grow with you for as long as this lifetime will allow,” he paused abruptly, body yearning for closeness that he'd felt so deprived of, and reached to press his face to Reiko's own, “then I will wait for you in the next.”


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“Not if I wait for you.” She teased lightly. Returning the feeling that not only would she remain loyal to him in this life, but the next as well. That she would watch over him and their family even in the life beyond this - because didn't she already do that without either of their knowledge?

She was a ghost given a second chance with her family, and none the wiser of this gift.

As his face pressed against hers there she'd remain for a moment to drink it in. She fought the feelings of despair that knocked at her gates, the feelings of treachery and that Quicksilver could turn on them too, on her... she fought them wanting to trust the druid. To continue trusting others despite the pain she had been put through for it already.

This time she would remain silent and enjoy the moment. Only moving enough to press a few kisses onto his muzzle. They could make it work, she knew they could.

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Quicksilver, too, maintained his silence. With his relationship with Reiko freshly recovering, he was scared to say the wrong thing. Reversing this early progress was the last thing he wanted. He remained quiet as they stood alongside one another beneath cool starlight, simply holding one another.

From his throat, a crooning sound. He closed his eyes and savoured the moment, the connection his heart longed to find.


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