everywhere we go

 

backdated to a few nights after her thread with rosencrantz!

It was not something she wanted to do, if she was being honest. Annika feared the reprecussions of her decisions, worried that it would insult @Harper and @Valeska or spit on their intentions or.. shit, she didn't know. Either way, she was wary of how things would go -- or even how she would be received after having taken such a long hiatus. It had been eye opening and unsettling, but now she had found her place in the world. Hopefully. There was every chance she could show up and things would be awful, wasn't there? Annika sucked in a breath, trying not to obsess over things that had not yet come to pass.

Annika arrived back home and sent up a low howl, calling for her sisters -- and yes, she considered both of them to be such now.

the staff team luvs u

[narrow width=700]At last.

After weeks of her absence, Annika had finally emerged from the shadows and sent out a call to the sisters of Elysium, her rich voice carrying the smallest, wavering note of uncertainty as it reached out to tickle the ears of the High Priestess. What? Was she afraid? Even after her time spent in Fate's Respite, she still did not take Valeska at her word?

Shaking her head, the little wolf left her hunt for dinner and padded quietly through the brush toward the outskirts of their territory. It was a beautiful evening, in spite of the clouds partially obscuring the sky overhead. The faintest tinge of purple still stained the horizon as the sun completed its descent, lending an ethereal air to the night; if there was ever a suitable backdrop to a goodbye, this was the closest thing.

“Annika?” Valeska called gently, affectionately. Even with their short time together, she could truly say she loved Annika like family; she had made a promise to the dark woman, and she would die before she would ever break it. “I worried for you. Had not seen you in some time.”

She paused, shifting a little. She wondered if Harper were near enough to hear the summons, but they could wait a while.

“... It is okay, Annika.”

Valeska smiled, a hint of sorrow tugging at the corners of her eyes as she did so. She would miss her, though perhaps the scarred wolf might still visit from time to time if she ever passed through - but she still needed to hear her say the words.

“I am just glad you are safe.”
[/narrow]
the staff team luvs u

^^

Harper had been back home, in Elysium, for all of an hour. Though still, the term home seemed to no longer fit that of Elysium, but rather, that of Ichorwood. Those gorgeous red trees called to her, and oh, she was already feeling like a piece of her had been missing.

She was resting, taking a nap in her den that almost no longer smelled of her, when the call came that turned Harper’s stomach in ways that she wished to vomit. Harper didn’t have the chance to tell her sister that she’d killed their father, or really, a chance for form any sort of bonding moments with her.

No, instead, the girl fled to the darkness before Harper had the chance to know her at all. She slowly arrived after Valeska had, the woman tilting her head with narrowed eyes. What was so bloody important that both of them needed to be here?

^^
the staff team luvs u

Annika's attention drifted to @Valeska as she approached, her familiar face bringing a sorrowful smile to her lips. "I had to get away from Nemean," she confessed, "and I found a few friends along the way." The wolf's ears bounced against her head briefly before she turned to see @Harper approaching as well, barely smelling of Elysium at all. The look on her face was clear: Annika meant nothing to her. She winced, wishing she hadn't called for the girl after all, but Annika stood her ground.

"If you don't want to be here, Harper, you don't have to stay," Annika bristled, but her expression was calm. Staying seemed to be impossible for her blood, didn't it? "I just came to explain that I would like to split my time between Elysium and a nomadic group, the Wayfarers. I haven't gotten used to living in one place. I don't like it. With them, I'll travel.. and I've made friends there. It's like what you're doing," she said, noting the heaviness of another pack on Harper's skin. "I am not leaving forever." Annika looked to Valeska, the words unspoken: you have been the sister I always wanted. Her ears splayed against her head, waiting.

the staff team luvs u

[narrow width=700]The words were bittersweet, but words they all needed to hear. Elysium had already begun its slow spiral into the dream-dust from whence it came, though Annika was gracious, and the silver wolf could feel no true sorrow for what she had to say. Happiness was ultimately meant to be chased - even if it lay far from here. She had always been independent; her new pack would suit her roving lifestyle far better than sitting complacently by as the great wild called out from beyond their treeline.

Harper's grim mood since her return had hung over Fate's Respite like a dark cloud, and Valeska could almost feel her before she even arrived. It pained her to see her sibling so miserable here, finally at home - home with her - but it seemed that time away had clouded whatever fondness remained for their lake. She could see the longing, the fierce disdain in Harper's amethyst eyes, and it hurt her worse than any flesh wound could. It might have been easier if they could simply brawl it out as they had last time, but this was a different situation. A different pain.

“Oh, Annika,” she said quietly, stepping forward to press her muzzle into the dark she-wolf's cheek. “You will always be welcome. It is so good that you have made friends! You are not meant to be lonely. See?”

It was true. Annika had resigned herself to a life of solitude and rejection, but even in spite of herself, she had found her way - and her place. They hadn't spent as much time together as Valeska might have chosen - it was often difficult getting her to do things, which remained a hard concept to grasp as a rabid extrovert - but she quickly grew close to her heart as both a dear friend and as family. Her fearsome resistance against affection only further provoked the little wolf, and it appeared her efforts had not been in vain.

“I am always one howl away,” she continued. “If do not immediately reply, maybe two.”

Her eyes shifted to Harper, and she gave her a gentle, teasing nudge to say something encouraging.

“You will have to introduce friends sometime, Annika! Would love to meet them.”
[/narrow]
the staff team luvs u

^^If you don’t want to be here, Harper, then you don’t have to stay.

Right then, Harper’s thoughts returned to the thoughts that she’d first had, upon learning that she had a sister; how she should have snuffed her right then and there, instead of dealing with this bullcrap. She had not come back to Elysium to be bitched out by some reject.

A low growl vibrated deep in her throat. She wondered who Valeska would side with, if the two dark women went for each other’s throats. “You don’t even like me, Annika. I know not why you wasted your time with summoning me here if you was only going to tell me to leave.” Despite the growls, Harper's voice was low, an octave above a whisper as she tried to hide the quiver and the hurt in her voice, knowing damn well the other wouldn't care.

She felt more welcome within the forests of Event Horizon. More loved, despite that her sister was here. Though, it was a different sort of love. It wasn’t that she hated being in Elysium, or that she hated Elysium… but oh, Harper could not even begin to explain it. Good thing she wouldn’t have to, either. That had been part of the agreement; some time there, some time here. It wouldn't matter, though; Harper knew when she was not welcome.

“Be safe on your travels.” Harper said softly as she dipped her head and turned to leave, in debate if she should just head back home.

// exit harper

^^
the staff team luvs u

Annika's eyes softened as @Valeska spoke, offering the words of reassurance she so desperately needed to hear. It was @Harper who incinerated things with her words, and Annika suppressed a soft growl in lieu of peacekeeping.

"What are you talking about? You don't like me. Ever since you found out I exist, you treat me like I'm nothing more than an inconvenience. I wanted a sister in you, Harper. I wanted a family. I wanted to have what you two have," she said, stepping forward to gesture at Valeska and the dark woman in turn. "I've tried. I've tried to bridge the gap between us, but you won't have any of it and apparently you get to fuck off with Crux without bothering to tell me goodbye, but I'm the shitty one for calling you? I care about you, but you don't care about anyone but yourself." Annika's eyes narrowed. "You hate me so much you can't even physically hide it. What am I supposed to do when I call for you and you show up looking like you're ready to brawl because I breathed the same air as you?" There was hurt. So much hurt.

"Valeska has been ten times the sister you have ever tried to be to me," she snapped as the woman retreated. Fine.

And then her form disappeared and she was gone, leaving only her angered breathing and Valeska to pick up the pieces. Her fur was bristled, irritation evident despite the tears stinging her eyes. "I am outcast wherever I go. It.. it just is what it is, right? Just need to suck it up." She wiped her eyes with the back of her paw, doing her best to pretend everything was just splendid.

the staff team luvs u

[narrow width=700]She couldn't understand it. Harper had, for whatever reason, turned as sour as a lemon over the course of a scant few months. Her recent wedding had been lavish and truly merry, gathering cheerful wolves from both packs with no incident to mar the occasion - so what was wrong? Had something happened in her travels to and from Ichorwood, maybe some foul encounter with a stranger or wild creature?

Her distaste for Annika alone without even giving her a chance to make friends still sat like a rock in her stomach. That - that above all else made the least sense to her. Maybe the she reminded Harper of a darker past, and she hadn't been able to grapple the image of her father, or even of her deceased brother Hatchet, without wanting to vomit. Yet how could she heal without confronting what was? Without making strides to become stronger, better, more complete than she was?

Annika had done no wrong by existing. Her halting attempts to reach out deserved to be embraced; celebrated.

If Harper would not have her, Valeska had more than enough room in her heart for them both. As their bitter words flowed over her like salt water, she closed her eyes, willing it to stop - and then suddenly it did, leaving only a breathless silence with the two of them standing awkwardly in front of each other. The little wolf hesitated, looking out toward where Harper had gone.

“That was... unfortunate,” she said at last, her mouth dry. “Annika, it is not you. You are lovely and nice, and have been only welcoming. I do not know what troubles her, but I think it is inside of her; not so much to do with things outside.”

She saw the tears welling up, she could hear the hitch in Annika's voice, the trembling breaths as she tried to settle her rapid-beating heart. Valeska closed the short distance between them and curved her neck around her shoulders in a gentle hug, pulling her close. “No, silly lady,” she soothed, “You are not outcast here. Not with me. Not with Amaranth. One wolf does not make a world of rejection - and I think Harper is still fighting demons too. Do not weep, my sister.”

For she was.

“I will be so happy to come visit, if you make temporary rest. Perhaps Amara and I can make trip! It will be fun, good to get out. Do you like the others you travel with?”
[/narrow]
the staff team luvs u

Annika's words did nothing but fade into nothingness as Harper's form completely disappeared, well out of earshot and too prideful to realize she had made just as many mistakes. Part of her has hoped to entice her sister's anger, for it to evolve into a physical brawl so the two of them could simply take out their frustrations on one another. The fact Harper had gone and @Valeska had stayed spoke legions about who was the better sister, and Annika was more than happy to scribble her name above Harper's. Annika had never asked to be reunited with family. She hadn't asked for that kind of grief.

"I'm sorry you had to hear that, Val," she said with a sigh. "I don't understand where she's getting that I don't like her. All I've done is try to be respectful of her personal space, to not overwhelm her with the knowledge of having another sister." The little wolf reassured her that she was not at fault, but it didn't change the fact she felt guilty nonetheless. "She doesn't have to take it out on me." Inner turmoil be damned. Everyone had their issues, Harper was no different.

Angry tears were wiped away from her eyes as she willed them back. "I could help her fight them if only she'd let me." Annika had her own army of demons, so she understood all too well. Pushing those closest away was one such a sign, but it wasn't her place to intervene. She had made it quite clear how she'd felt about her older sister and Annika would respect it.

"I will visit as often as I can. Yours and Amara's company would be welcome," she admitted with a soft smile. "I do like them, yes. A few of them have the emotional capacity of a rock, but they have good hearts. There's a woman there I wish I could be when I grow up." A laugh to punctuate her joke. "But it is a small group. Small and weird, but I like it."

the staff team luvs u

[narrow width=700]From what she knew of Harper - and that was no small amount, given their extreme highs and lows over the past year after finally re-emerging into each other's lives - it was that the surly woman expected everyone to dislike her. She didn't like to wait for someone to form an opinion; for her, it seemed that if she went ahead and force-fed them a conclusion she had already predetermined, they could not hurt her. She wore it like armor; like steel. To risk letting someone close - to venture so far as to be vulnerable with another, if only for a glimpse at what could be happiness - was impossible. Harper was always on the defensive, ready to be hurt. Ready to be hated.

Valeska sighed, staring off toward where her sister had vanished. Crux seemed to be the only one she let near her heart nowadays, which was even more peculiar as they had only barely known each other before deciding that marriage was the next logical step.

Still, she seemed happy - at least with him.

Must have been pheromones or something.

“It is well,” she reassured the dark female, offering a gentle bump with her muzzle. “She goes in thinking no one will like her; thus, it is like self-fulfilling prophecy. Unfortunate, but cannot help unless she wants to be helped. Maybe Eventful Horizon is good for her - many social exposure, many chance to be proven wrong. Yet it does not justify her treatment of you, and I am sorry she is so... prickly. Like the cactus.”

Valeska smiled warmly at Annika's description of her new family. The gods did work in mysterious ways, and perhaps Harper's firm rejection managed to lead her to better circumstances after all. She deserved to be within a group who all accepted her, celebrated her for what and who she was; Annika was an affectionate soul, a gentle river behind tumultuous eyes full of pain. She could not fault her for wishing to belong.

From one 'small and weird' to the next.

“You will always be welcome, wherever we are,” she said. “I wish you true happiness - true joy. You are dearest of friends to me, dark flower. I promise we will visit!”

The pale wolf stepped forward to at last offer a final embrace, pressing her shoulder into Annika's side as she wrapped as much of her neck around her tall form as she could manage. She smelled sweeter today; more vanilla, less smoke.

“With all of my loving, be well.”

{Exit Valeska}

@Annika
[/narrow]
the staff team luvs u